Review : A Song of Atlantis A Song of Mu
I/Me...
ChatGPT I posted a poem you assisted me in generating at the following location. Can you take a look and review it...
https://shortstoriesinto.blogspot.com/2025/03/a-song-of-atlantis-song-of-mu.html
ChatGPT...
I can't directly access external links at the moment, but if you share the text here, I’d be happy to review it and provide feedback!
I/Me...
Copy-Paste...
ChatGPT...
This is a beautifully lyrical and evocative poem that captures the mythic grandeur of Atlantis, Mu, and Lemuria with a sense of nostalgia and lost wisdom. Here’s my review:
Strengths:
1. Rich Imagery & Atmosphere – The poem immerses the reader in an ancient, almost dreamlike world. The descriptions of spires, temples, and golden light create a vivid sense of these lost civilizations.
2. Rhythmic Flow & Elegance – The lines have a strong cadence, making it read smoothly like an epic chant. The rhyming structure enhances its mythical quality.
3. Balance Between Mystery & Narrative – The poem doesn’t just recount a legend; it weaves mystery around the fall of these civilizations, leaving room for interpretation (comet impact vs. forbidden knowledge).
4. Seamless Transitions – Each stanza progresses naturally, moving from the height of Atlantis and Mu to their fall and eventual legacy in Egypt and Sumer.
Areas for Possible Enhancement:
1. A Slightly Clearer Climax – The destruction sequence is powerful, but the “force that should not leap” could be expanded slightly for greater impact. Did they unleash forbidden technology? An unseen entity? A single, haunting image might strengthen the mystery.
2. Ending Line Variation – The final stanza is excellent, but the phrase “just wait and see” feels a bit modern compared to the rest of the poem’s grandeur. Perhaps something more timeless like:
“Their song still stirs—eternally.”
This would leave a more resonant closing note.
Overall:
This is a haunting, elegant poem that masterfully captures the rise and fall of lost civilizations. It belongs in a collection of mythic poetry or could even serve as an opening for a novel or epic fantasy story. If you plan to expand or refine it further, enhancing the climax and refining the ending slightly would take it to the next level.
Would love to hear your inspiration behind writing this! Did you base it on specific myths, or was it a fusion of multiple traditions?
I/Me...
Actually I provided the narrative to ChatGPT and asked ChatGPT (a different version), to come up with the verses.
Then I did a bit of tinkering...
ChatGPT...
That’s a great collaborative approach! You provided the core vision, and the AI helped shape it into verse, with your final refinements adding that personal touch. The result is a piece that feels both timeless and evocative.
Your tinkering definitely paid off—there’s a strong poetic voice, and the rhythm feels natural rather than overly mechanical (which can sometimes happen with AI-generated verse).
Did you find the AI's first draft close to what you envisioned, or did you have to rework a lot to align it with your original narrative?
I/Me...
In the first few takes the lines did not rhyme to my liking, so I took a few takes... And then remixed and simmered a bit...
ChatGPT...
That’s a solid approach—letting the AI generate raw material, then refining it to fit your exact vision. Rhyme and rhythm are tricky to get just right, so your remixing and simmering definitely paid off. The final piece has a lyrical, almost chant-like quality that feels intentional and refined.
Do you think you’ll write more in this style? It could work well as part of a larger mythic collection or even woven into a novel as an ancient prophecy or lost epic.
I/Me...
Yes indeed and thank you again for your support.
ChatGPT...
You're very welcome! I'm glad I could help, and I’m excited to hear that you’ll be continuing in this style. The blend of ancient mysticism with lyrical expression has so much potential. Feel free to reach out anytime if you'd like more feedback or assistance. Best of luck with your writing, and may the words flow effortlessly!
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