Review - Gemini : A Song of Atlantis A Song of Mu

 I/Me...

Gemini can you review the following poem...

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Gemini...

This poem is evocative and ambitious, drawing on the well-known myths of Atlantis and Mu to create a sense of ancient wonder and loss. Here's a breakdown of its strengths and some points to consider:

Strengths:

Atmospheric Language: The poem effectively uses vivid imagery ("silver beams," "golden light," "fiery gusts") to create a sense of a lost, magical world. The language is rich and engaging.

Mythic Scope: It captures the grandeur and mystery associated with these legendary civilizations. The poem manages to create a feeling of vast time spans and grand events.

Narrative Flow: The poem tells a coherent story, moving from the description of these advanced civilizations to their tragic demise and the survival of their knowledge.

Intriguing Questions: The poem leaves the reader with a sense of mystery, pondering the causes of the civilizations' destruction and the legacy they left behind.

Evocative Ending: The ending encourages the reader to engage with the myth on a personal level, inviting them to dream and imagine the lost worlds.

Good Rhythm and Rhyme: The poem generally keeps a good rhythm and rhyme scheme, which makes it pleasant to read and listen to.

Points to Consider:

Clichés: Some phrases ("times and dreams," "wisdom vast") are somewhat clichéd. While they contribute to the mythic tone, they could be replaced with more original imagery.

Historical Accuracy: While the poem is not intended to be historically accurate, it's worth noting that the concepts of Atlantis and Mu are largely considered myths. If the purpose of the poem is to be considered as a myth, then this point is moot.

The "They Woke a Force" Line: While mysterious, this line is vague. Consider making it more specific, even if it remains shrouded in mystery.

The "Shades of Days" Line: This line is somewhat vague, and might benefit from more specific wording.

The ending: The ending, while good, ends somewhat abruptly.

Overall:

The poem successfully creates a sense of wonder and mystery around the myths of Atlantis and Mu. It's a compelling piece of imaginative writing that invites the reader to ponder the nature of lost civilizations and the enduring power of myth. With some minor revisions, it could be even more impactful.

In short, it is a good poem, that has the potential to be a great poem, with some minor adjustments.

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